tipping the scale in my favour?

Something about today has put me in a good mood. This is a nice change considering I’ve been in FOUL HUMOUR for several weeks now. Weeks I tell you.

What is it about today though? Can I quantify what has made me actually feel optimistic about what lies ahead (”what” = life in general)?

1. it’s no longer fucking hot. Sorry, that deserved a swear. For the next two days the temperatures will be “reasonable” — and by reasonable I mean under 30C. Thank God. I actually switched off the a/c and opened the windows this morning!

2. my baby turns 6 months old today. We have moved through the infant stage and are now entering (what I call) the baby stage. A baby who in the next several months will become mobile and will no longer be nursing (i.e. attached to me). More on that in a later post.  Oh shit (again!), now I’ve started crying.

3. The door to any future children coming from my marriage has been permanently, um, severed, if I may say so. Oddly enough I am not as sad about this as I thought I might be. I’m actually greatly relieved. I have 3 beautiful wonderful smart funny quirky awesome daughters and I want to enjoy them without fearing that another may come along and throw my universe into a tailspin again.

4. the childcare situation seems to be levelling out and proceeding on an even keel for now. As of next Tuesday and lasting until September I no longer have to cart the kids to daycare. Friday will be Maja’s LAST day of daycare. I may cry. Oh who am I kidding, I WILL cry. As a matter of fact, I’m crying now. Still.

5. some fabric and a pattern I’ve been eyeing for months now finally arrived. Mostly because I took the plunge and actually ordered it last week instead of just seizing it up online — so the delay was totally my doing. I’m optimistic that I will be able to start sewing some more now in the evenings. Not that anything has changed much, except my optimism. I even ordered the accompanying zippers. Wonder of wonders.

6. I got some new sandals which I love and they have a heel and they’re strappy and they’re cute and they make me feel cute. Which goes to say that these sandals have some kind of magic to them.

camping trip #2 — structures

This past weekend we had a great camping trip at Cape Henlopen State Park. I chose this particular park because of it’s proximity to the beach. I do love me some going to the beach — waves, ocean, sand, sun. Funny thing, though, is that I don’t actually go IN the ocean because I’m convinced there are sharks that are going to eat me and I don’t spend time IN the sun because I don’t want to get a sunburn. So, I love the beach from my dry beach towel in the shade.

Speaking of shade, we invested in a little beach shade tent for this trip. Sure, I can rent an umbrella at the beach… but this is way cooler and in the long run much cheaper. The shade tent will come in handy for our week in Cape May as well as any other trip to a sunny location that we’ll want a little shade at.

Our little beach tent (it’s a Coleman Road Trip Beach Shade). Look closely and you can see Pippa hanging out in there.

Here’s a better view of the inside. You can easily get 2 beach towels in there and still be in the shade.

The flap zips up, too, so you can create a change room!

Now, on to the camping tent itself. We bought the North Face Mountain Manor 8 tent. It’s huge.

This is the interior of the tent. Going from the left, we have a double air mattress, then the pack’n'play for Pippa, some floor space, and the two sleeping bags on their foam mats for Maddy & Maja. At night I also bring in a chair so that if Pippa wakes up I can sit and nurse her. The tent is tall, too, and I can easily stand upright in it (I’m 5′8″).

I’m very happy with this tent and I’m glad we invested in it. It has 2 room dividers, too, which as you can see from the photo we have rolled up. Eventually the girls will want their own space and at that point we can roll the dividers down. And when it gets to the point where the girls will want their own tent… well, then Richard and I will enjoy having a huge space for ourselves. Woot!

p.s. Coleman & North Face did not pay me in any way, shape, or form to say any of the above.

I hired a mother’s helper!

Because apparently I can not do it all.

No, no wait, ummmm, that’s not true. I CAN do it all, but now I can do it all without losing my cool (or my sanity) two days a week and every second Wednesday (I like a schedule).

You know how it goes: you’re at work all day, you pick up 3 kids from wherever they spend their days, you walk in the front door and everyone is hungry and no one is happy and everyone wants some attention.

At.the.same.time.

• You haven’t planned dinner because you’re an organizational mess
  **really, I should have learned by now**
• You would like to maybe go to the bathroom without taking all three kids with you.
  **there are some things that beg for privacy**
• You would like to get changed out of your work clothes without a running critique on your body.
  **mama, what’s that?**

And the reality is that there is only 1 of me. One body, one pair of hands, one set of ears, one lap, one mouth, one set of eyes. And there are three kids: one of which can be found attached to my body most of the time; one of which can be found climbing the kitchen cabinets at any given time and sitting on the counter…; one of which will quietly entertain herself unless she’s being bullied by the cabinet-climber who decided that pulling her sister’s hair really is more fun.

It makes my head explode.

And that can be kind of messy. Also, it would leave my children without a mother.

So, I hired a “mother’s helper” in the form of one 13-y.o. who lives across the street. It’s awesome. She comes over Mondays, Thursdays, and every second Wednesday for about 1 to 1.5 hrs. Her sole task it to play with Maja and Maddy while I get lunchbags unpacked, changed, dinner together, feed Pippa… whatever. And for $8 / hour it’s totally totally worth it.

It’s cheaper then therapy and it’s cheaper then a divorce lawyer. ha!

The first day she came over Maddy wanted nothing to do with her. Maja was perfectly entertained, however — and I didn’t have to break up WWIII in my living room while simultaneously cooking dinner.

I’m hopeful that this will be the beginning of a good routine. It’s good to admit that I can’t do it all — I’m glad I have my mother’s helper.

really?

It’s really been over a month since I’ve posted? oops.
I have much to say.
*Emerson has moved
*bought a tent to go camping
*house fire (not ours)
*back to work
*hired a mother’s helper
*got an iPhone!
*birthday season is upon us

… and much more.

Now just to find the time to write it all down… that’s the challenge.

they are, afterall, part Canadian

This past December we had an epic snowfall — well, epic using Philadelphia standards. I think it was the biggest snowfall that we’ve had in December in a 100 years? or something like that. Of course this called for: SLEDDING/TOBOGANNING/SLIDING (call it what you will).

I was a little nervous sending Maja out to the park with a sled because last year when Richard and I took her sledding she got a face full of snow on her first run down the hill — we had to go home with her screaming the whole way back. Thankfully, however, this year was much better! She actually enjoyed herself!

tummy sliding, toboggan riding, snow slipping, saucer-flying!!!!!

I think she spent about 6 hrs out there on the toboggan hill that sunny day. I’m not kidding. She was loving it. And best of all? Maddy had fun too — they were both fearless!

early October

Early fall in Philadelphia is something to enjoy. No bugs, no heat, no humidity, the sun is bearable, and the temps are mild (upper 60s, low 70s — high teens, low 20s for my Cdn friends).

We were able to enjoy some time at the playground on Saturday afternoon. Not just enjoy because the weather cooperated, but because the girls were not fighting over who got to push the babydoll and stroller.

I may need to have a new rule: all toys MUST come into this house in duplicate (and soon, triplicate).

Marital awesomeness

You know what’s really awesome? When you get home late from taking the kidlets to ballet and find out that your husband got home early and during that time he: took out all the trash, put out the recycling, put the cloth diapers in the laundry, washed the kids’ lunch containers and made their lunch for the next day, took the dog out and fed him AND still managed to arrive for dinner before you. That is awesome.

I must have given him some hope for happiness because while I was putting the kids to bed he also swept the bathroom & closet floors, cleaned the bathroom sink, tidied the kitchen, and finished the 2nd load of diaper laundry.

This evening I have to go to a meeting from 6-8pm and have to bring the kids with me. I told Richard that he didn’t need to attend the meeting, but that if he happened to get home early and had an urge to re-grout the bathroom tile in his spare time that I wouldn’t object.

Baby Roasted Marshmallow

Can you believe that this is the name that Maja has given to the yet-to-be-born child? Roasted Marshmallow. Or just Marshie if she’s feeling like shortening it. Even Madeleine has taken to calling my bulging stomach Marshmallow. Maybe they’re on to something because come to think of it I do kinda feel like a marshmallow, all soft and squishy and not full of much substance.

Mind you I shouldn’t complain, really. Roasted Marshmallow is one step better then the first name she had picked: Sally the Camel. Yes, I am going to give birth to a camel.

What is this kid thinking?!?

Truth be told when Maja came up with this name I wasn’t entirely sure how to react – I didn’t want to shut her down completely, but really? Roasted Marshmallow? Are you nuts? You’re kidding, right? You’re insane. NO WAY JOSE. It’s incendiary!

Being the Good Mother that I am, however, I instead said that it was a fabulous name and we’d put it on the list and if we didn’t pick it she was certainly free to use it as a nickname. Which I’m entirely sure she will do.

Choosing a name is not an easy business. Everyone has an opinion. Including apparently my kids. But there is a line there… and clearly Roasted Marshmallow is on the other side of that line. Waaaaaaaay on the other side of the line. Ok, well, maybe even in this case it’s more like an impenetrable brick wall. Encased in steel. Guarded by a few very scary monsters.

Of course there must be a million tales out there of what older siblings wanted to name a younger sibling! Are you an older sibling? Did you have a hand in naming a younger one? Did you let your older child play a part in naming your younger child? SHARE your story!

And here’s a parting gift which I promised to post last month:

when something works a little TOO well

I’ve written before about the Potty Issues we’ve been having with Maja. While things had improved slightly since then, they took a turn for the worse last week and it culminated in a trip to the pediatrician with x-rays and some extra intervention.

She’s going to love me in a few years that I’m talking about this in the internet. I know it. Well, that’s what therapy is for.

But before I get into the nitty gritty details I want to say that unless you have a medical degree from a REAL university, I do not want your medical advice. We have a pediatrician whom we trust and who is part of one of the leading children’s hospitals in North America. If you and your credentials can’t top that… keep your opinions on our treatment method to yourself. Thankyouverymuch.

I’ve you been in the position we are in and if you want to share a similar story, then by all means feel free to do so. I can talk poop with the best of parents.

Anywhoo, back to my story: after SIX days of no production last week we ended up at the pediatrican. Diagnosis: encopresis. Fun times. I jest – it’s awful. Not only is it a physical problem, it’s emotional too. Many many many tears were shed in our house last week: frustration, anger, exhaustion, confusion… you name it we had it. Our pediatrician gave us some literature to read and told us to increase the miralax and increase Maja’s fiber intake. Me, loving a challenge, said “no problem.”

Saturday morning found us at the farmer’s market and I probably bought enough fruits and vegetables (i.e. fiber!) to clear out the digestive system of an elephant. Pears, apples, raspberries, peaches, plums, blueberries, carrots… In order to ensure that Maja therefore eats all of this, I now make her a smoothie every morning. She enjoys it because all I do is lay out a variety of fruits on the counter and she gets to toss into the blender whatever strikes her fancy. My only stipulation is that I will not peel any of the fruit (yeah, especially the blueberries!) – afterall, most of the fiber and vitamins are found in the peels! I WILL peel citrus, though. I’m not that mean.  I “water” the smoothie down with prune juice (shhhh, though, she thinks it’s plum juice – which I suppose it is) and whatever other frozen juices I have in the freezer. Letting Maja participate in this process gives her a sense of ownership / control and ensures me that she’s actually going to drink the smoothie.

My other trick to make sitting on the potty fun, instead of a chore, is to have activities for her to do while she’s up there. I invested in a clipboard and stocked it with a sticker book, blank paper, word searches, mazes, and a few small colouring books. She also got a new set of pencil crayons in a fun pencil case. When I get a few minutes of free time, I’ll sew up a fun bag for all of these items that will get hung on a hook next to the potty so she can get to the goodies on her own.

Not to get boastful about all of this but so far, SO FAR this is working and she’s managed to have a successful poop 4 out of 5 days. This is unprecedented as she hasn’t pooped this regularly for over 2 years. In fact it’s working so well that… she now won’t get OFF the potty. That’s right. A week ago today she was screaming and fighting the idea of the potty. Last night? She pooped, got her “reward” (chocolate) and then insisted that she needed to go again because she wanted to continue playing with her toys.

And that is parenting in a nutshell, no? Going from one extreme to the other while really trying to find the middle ground.

You know your kids are tired when…

1. You find out that your toddler CAN eat in her sleep. Madeleine sat at the dinner table, eyes closed, and still managed to consume noodles. And drink water. Quite a feat. She hardly even made a mess.

2. Your preschooler begins to have irrational thoughts. Example: we went to a birthday party on Saturday afternoon and upon leaving both girls got a “take home” bag with a little thank you gift in it. I stuck it in the swim bag and told Maja she could open it when we got home. Which she did. She immediately followed-up with a complete and total meltdown. Apparently what she thought was going to be in the bag was a rubber ducky EXACTLY like the one she had “lost” (note, it’s not lost, just misplaced) months ago which her Grandma had given her. Riiiiiiiiight.

3. They start giggling uncontrollably and randomly fall over.